3 years ago

3 years ago, we went to Cornwall for a long weekend to mark the end of my last-ever exams, to go surfing and, as it turned out, get engaged. So many of our friends had joked that this would turn out to be the reason for the trip that I really did not think it would happen. I had been wondering if and when we would get engaged for a while (and even had a bet with a friend at a wedding that we would be engaged during the 12 months following that wedding in Feb 2008. She bet yes, I bet no. I still owe her that tenner) and lay on the beach speculating when over the next summer it might happen, if it did. I didn't have long to wait at all. M returned to the beach after dropping his surfboard off with fish, chips, champagne and two glasses. 

And, as it turned out, a ring. 

2 years on

I, Rachel, take you, M, to be my lawfully wedded husband. To have and to hold, from [that] day forward. I promise to do your laundry and to eat the food that you cook for me, except for cakes, which I will make, for I am better at that. I will do my best to only use one tea cup per day and when I don't, to put the whole lot in the dishwasher before you come home. For better, for worse, in Somerset and in London. I promise to get out of bed and get to work on time, just as long as you remember to ring me on your way to the station to help wake me up. For richer, for poorer, I will try not to do so much shopping just as long as you are earning more of the money. As soon as my law loans are paid, I promise you will be able to buy as much wine as you like. I will pick up my clothes off the floor and try and wear the ones that I have, rather than my endless quest for something new. Or, sell them on ebay. In sickness and in health, with my migraines and endo and my general whining, I promise to keep the roar to a whisper and to feed you hayfever tablets every day from March til September, never letting the house run out of tissues. I promise to listen to your work chat, without getting distracted. I will learn about wine and support without mocking the endless round of dinners and entertaining. To love you, unconditionally, and to cherish, without taking, when we are together and not-together, in Somerset and London, til death do us part. This is my solemn vow.

(Inspired by Anna K of Any Other Wedding, who also shares our wedding anniversary)

---
iphone snap by me of our anniversary peonies in the bathroom

The Friday Before (2 years on)

This time, two years ago, the weather was identical. That soft perfect rainy English June country weather. The kind that marks Glastonbury and picnics and seaside holidays in the south-west. Warm-ish but with pretty insistent rain, sweeping in off the coast, creating magnificent clouds and strange darkness for mid summer. Where you feel as if you should be wearing rolled up jeans and boatshoes, or shorts and wellies, a jersey and a waterproof. A hat, maybe. Holiday weather.

This time, two years ago, we were wondering whether the marquee would actually fit on the lawn, buying beer and soft drinks as fast as possible and generally engaging in lots of wedding organising. In amongst all of this, a massive box arrived from a flower farm - brim full of peonies. The ones that day were all white, and we stored them in two box/bucket things, waiting for about 11pm when, finally, my mother and I turned them into bouquets (with the assistance of my Dad).

Today, the same box arrived at work. Slightly smaller, but containing 4 dozen peonies. Some white, some pink. Some barely breaking, most tightly wrapped. Some sit on my desk at work in a borrowed vase. The rest are in buckets at home, waiting to be arranged in enamel jugs. Two years ago, wedding over, we set off for Cornwall and our honeymoon with all the leftover peonies. I remember remarking at the time to Husband how wonderful the jugs of peonies were, and how in the future they would take me straight back to that wonderful two weeks in June. He remembered. They have.

Oxfam Bridal

I'm over at Any Other Wedding today, talking about my dress and Oxfam Bridal. Pop over if you're interested to read more.

And if you're here from Any Other Wedding, welcome.

The Wedding: Your Questions Answered

Did you enjoy your wedding? I know that might sound strange but I know you put so much beautiful home made effort into your day and I often forget to enjoy things I've organised myself. So I know it was a really wonderful occasion for both of you - we can see it in your beaming photos - but did you manage to put yourself in the moment and really have fun and if so how and when?

Yes. I really did genuinely enjoy the day. Afterwards I know this because at no time did I think about the time or think about anything other than what I was doing. Aside from crippling period pains after the church service I also did not have any stomach related anxieties (which I often get at events) and I also managed to eat a plate of food without even thinking about it, which is *unheard* of for me at events when I am anxious or nervous.

I had so much fun all day, from getting ready with my family to marrying my Husband and then partying with my friends and family in the evening. I loved dancing with my bridesmaids and with my Husband and also with my Dad. I enjoyed gossiping with some of my school friends in the loos and the man who lived on the estate that had just returned from a sailing trip who we invited to join the party (who then kissed on my girlfriends). Those were the un-photographed moments which no-one ever mentions but really make the party.

Where did you get your dress and did you have a cake-cake or just a cheese-cake?

My dress came from Oxfam Bridal in Southampton which I then had re-tailored in a couple of places to fit me better. My lace shrug came from Monsoon Bridal and the sash was a silk ribbon custom dyed by Cam Creations to match my shoes (which were Rupert Sanderson). The silk scarf I am wearing in some of the photos was given to me by my Mother-in-Law and is the tartan of my new family name. I also wore a white and blue garter handmade by my sister and pearl earrings that were loaned to me by my Mother-in-Law.

Cam Creations also dyed silk ribbon the same colour which I used to tie the the bouquets and name labels to linen napkins.

The cake we cut was our cheese cake which had four local cheeses: Godminster Cheddar, Wild Garlic Cornish Yarg, Cornish Blue and St Edellion Cornish Brie. In addition to the cheese each of our mother's made a traditional fruit wedding cake with marzipan and white royal icing.

Is there anything you would have done differently? Do you think about that?

Every so often, yes. I would have asked the photographer to not take our portraits from 2 steps beneath us and wish she had suggested posing outside the church door instead. I wish I had asked her to take more details shots. I would have liked a photograph with Husband and his brother, and Husband and his friends. (But he isn't bothered, as he isn't bothered about photographs much anyway).

I would also have liked to have finished getting ready with my Mum and bridesmaids, rather than putting my dress on by myself and realising that the bridesmaids and Mum had already left in their car. But I did enjoy the extra time with my Dad. We had a quick last cup of coffee (which I narrowly missed spilling down the front of my dress when I walked into a low beamed doorway whilst holding the cup). We also forgot to drink the champagne...

I wish Husband had not had to do so much running around in the morning (but we did choose to do everything ourselves, so it was unavoidable).

I wish nature hadn't given me a period which arrived on the way to the church. I wish the friend who said he would video the ceremony had turned up on time so that we would have had a recording of the ceremony. (Neither of these were in my control though, so I couldn't have organised things any differently).

I also would have liked the vicar to have called my Godfather by the correct name, for the organist not to have started a hymn which was supposed to be played by my Godfather on the piano (despite us having rehearsed it the day before) and for him to have gone back on his promise for a 5 minute sermon and actually taking 25. But again, out of my control.

All in all though the things I would have done differently were minor. And of no real consequence: It was still a fabulous day. As for the place, the event, the decoration, the guests and so on, I wouldn't have changed any of it. Why do you keep banging on about your wedding?

A myriad reasons really, mainly that it's my blog and as such I write about my life. Though, as this post is pretty much the last you will hear about the wedding itself, you will be no doubt pleased to hear that I won't be "banging on" about it for much longer.

Did you have breakfast? And were the speeches good? (I always like them best!)

On the morning of the wedding I woke at 6am feeling like utter crap. Like I had flu: hot sweats, cold sweats and aching. {of course, this turned out to my period coming, but as I wasn't expecting it I didn't put two and two together until much later...}. So I had coffee and croissants and nurofen and paracetemol for breakfast, in bed with both my sisters. I would post the photo but I rather think my whole family would prefer that their nightclothed selves were kept well away from the internets. I had a few more cups of coffee later in the morning and some light lunch (soup and sandwiches cut into small bites by my Granny).

The speeches were excellent. We opted to stick with the traditional three: my father, the groom and the best man, with Husband's father making a short fourth toast to absent friends. Husband didn't write his but spoke off the cuff, bringing down the place in gales of laughter, swearing twice and telling everyone how much they had touched us. My father spoke movingly of me flying the nest and about my childhood & Ben, Husband's best man, spoke eloquently of some of the misdeamours he and Husband had got up to over the years and about Husband and my relationship and future.

Favorite photos, details, and feelings are always good!

I still can't decide on a favourite photo. I like all of them, for different reasons.

Details wise, by some sort of fluke, the bunting I had made until I decided to stop fitted *exactly* round the dance floor. I was also very pleased how the mismatched crockery and peacock feathers worked to decorate the tables. I also like the way our top table was not really a top table and the reception line worked so that we were the last to eat rather than our guests waiting for us as if we were somehow more important than them.

I also liked that the whole reception felt like a house party and everyone seemed entirely comfortable helping themselves to drinks and food and then dancing and talking all evening. In every single photo everyone is smiling and everyone told me what a good time they had. For me, that is the mark of a good party and the only thing we strived for when planning the reception.

As for the ceremony, the moment when Dad and I reached the altar and Husband and I looked at each other for the first time summed up the whole reason why were marrying each other. It seemed so surreal saying those words to each other and knowing that we were becoming man and wife. I will remember forever saying those vows and giving each the rings and the way that I had to ask the vicar to repeat one of the lines because I became overcome with emotion. And then turning round during the last hymn, which was Jerusalem, and singing arm in arm, looking at all our friends and family, all singing, and catching people's eyes and having to blink back tears.

What did you learn about yourself through the planning process?

Cliched though it may sound, I was very reassured to find that together Husband and I make a good team. About myself specifically, I learnt (or perhaps, already knew) that I am somewhat of a control freak: I like things done properly and if delegated to someone else, I like them done to the standard I would have done it myself. (I have this problem at work too sometimes when my secretary hole punches things unevenly for example).

The wedding planning also reinforced a lot of things I already knew about myself: that I prefer homemade to bought a lot of the time, that friends and family being involved in my/our life is extremely important to me, that I like to host parties, that I prefer local and seasonal food, that I *love* a bargain and if I can save money making or doing something myself then I will.

I have also learnt how to work side by side with my Mum and not resorting to shouting at each other and that being married makes me very happy. That problems that seemed insurmountable on my own are conquerable with my Husband.

And, reassuringly, we both like to throw parties in the same way: good food, good friends, music and lots of champagne.

{Photos by K T Thompson & family}

The wedding: any questions?

I know that I never finished my wedding recaps. Somewhere between returning from the honeymoon and trying to find a job I started to find it hard to write about the wedding. That chapter of my life seemed to have been closed when we returned from the honeymoon.

But now, almost 6 months on, I've started to think about the wedding again. I have printed a wedding photograph and put it in a photo frame. I have started to think about compiling an album from the day & another from the honeymoon.

So I thought I'd turn to you, readers longtime and readers new. What would you like to know about the wedding, the planning or the honeymoon? I will answer all questions (within reason!), so post your requests in the comments and later on in the week I will post the answers.

{Image by KT Photos}

I wish I was...

We didn't choose a far flung place for our honeymoon or use the occasion as a chance to visit foreign climes. We have the rest of our married life for that. After the three months prior to the wedding we needed fresh air, beautiful surrounding and time to be together. Simple living, dark skies, a fire to cook on, a space decorated with simple furniture and flowers plucked from the hedgerows.

We spent a week staying in a yurt on a farm in the countryside above Fowey in a field full of sheep, where all power & light came from the fire, solar powered batteries and a single ringed gas hob. We spent our days reading, painting, lying side by side on our backs on cushions in the field whilst listening to Wimbledon on a solar powered radio, eating nice fish and drinking some amazing wines. We went to the beach, to the Minack theatre, to small fishing pubs and horse riding. We talked of our dreams, our hopes, our fears. We sat and watched suns setting and revelled in being married. We planned our lives together and returned to London refreshed, tanned, freckled, together & married.

Now that the nights have really drawn in, the leaves have fallen & been taken away by the council in bags and I *still* don't have the job of my dreams, I look back on those two weeks when all cares were far away and thank Husband every day that we chose such a honeymoon.

things which went wrong at our wedding

It was three months yesterday since our wedding. I am not sure I am going to finish the actual recaps but I will get round to sharing some of the details. With this is mind, I thought I'd share this: at every party or event or wedding things will go wrong. Most of which the guests will not notice, some of which the bride will not notice. As with everything in life, it is what you make of it that counts.

Things which went wrong at our wedding:

* The marquee boys who refused to come and do a site visit discovered (after getting their van stuck because they couldn't follow instructions) that the marquee they brought wouldn't fit on the lawn, despite us sending site measurements. Then we discovered that the chairs were all filthy and the generator may not have had enough diesel in it. We made them cups of tea and told them to do the best they could. We also told them to clean the chairs. They didn't. After the wedding we complained that several family members had to spend the morning of the wedding cleaning chairs. They eventually agreed to send a refund. Yesterday they sent an e-mail asking for photos showing their marquees at events over the summer to showcase their excellent feedback from events. We are going to send them the photos of the chairs being cleaned...

* The friend of ours who was going to video the wedding for us didn't turn up to the wedding until after the service had started, despite him telling me he was a professional when 3 days beforehand I reminded him to turn up in good time. He hasn't mentioned the wedding since, nor whether he got any footage. Thankfully another family friend happened to film some of the entrance and exits and sent us a beautiful DVD of what she had shot the other day. On the day itself I didn't even notice the lack of camera but afterwards I was sad that we didn't have the footage. Moral of that story: if something means a lot to you, pay someone to do it. They are less likely to not do it.

* My period arrived on the way to the church, 2 days early. Well, it explained the fact I felt like utter crap when I woke up on the morning, and thankfully I made it to the loo in time to not ruin my dress. I did feel a bit trance like for parts of the service due to strong pain killers (but that could just have been the day!) and the vintage champagne in the car went straight to my head. Other than that the only real impact it had was in the hotel that evening ...

* The vicar went on for so long (and called people by the wrong names) that we had to cut short all the photos and our photoshoot together that we had planned. I was disappointed for about 2 seconds before I realised that it was about the party not the specific photos and we would still have plenty. More disappointing was the vicar telling the photographer she wasn't welcome in the church again as she accidentally took a photo during the part she wasn't supposed to photo. (We didn't tell him that his 20 minute sermon -instead of 5 mins- cost my Mother a lot in delayed taxi costs).

* The candles on the top table hadn't had their wicks cut off so burnt onto the tablecloth. We had bought the cloths ex-rental and my Dad sorted it out and I barely noticed let alone minded.

* The power went half way through the band as something overheated. It was quickly sorted out by my Dad with assistance from A3 and Husband. It added to the homemade atmosphere and was sorted so quickly it made no real difference.

* The DJ lined up our first dance song and then went to get a drink. Another friend tried to start some music as she didn't realise the pause was to gather people for our first dance. The song started before anyone was ready and had to be started again when we were ready. Again, hardly anyone noticed and Husband and I certainly didn't mind that the song was no longer a surprise.

* When we cleared up the next day we discovered that ALL of the peacock feathers we had used as table decorations had been taken by the guests. Leaving none for the vase I had planned in our house (!) and none for my Grannie as I had promised. Again, I was disappointed for about half a second before being pleased that people had liked the decorations enough to remove them all from the reception.

Perhaps other things did go wrong, I don't remember, or I didn't notice. I was too busy having a good time dancing with my new Husband and enjoying the band and DJ:

{All photos by KT Thompson}

My secret to a happy marriage*

*Title shamelessly stolen from A Cup of Jo's Series, my favourite of which being Cara's.

We've only been married for three months but I can say that, so far, my secret to a happy marriage is threefold:

1. Work as a team. Remembering that I am not just an individual but one half of a team has been hard work, especially in relation to jobs and no money. Thankfully Husband has the patience of a saint and is able to remind me of this. In return I have been trying to do more than my share of the housework as he is doing more than his share of the earning.

2. Go to lots of gigs. Spend time together. Laugh lots. We snuck back to London early (planned) from our honeymoon to go and see Neil Young:

3. Have amazing friends who will laugh with you through the good times and lift you through the bad times. In fact, who will do both for you when you least expect it:

{Top two images by me; bottom two by KT Thompson}

Back soon

We are off to our fourth wedding of the summer tomorrow. I expect it to be along the same lines as ours, only bigger & grander. I bought a new dress from COS, so I can wear my wedding shoes.

I looked through our wedding photos again today. It suddenly struck me that in every single photo, people are smiling. In all the photos of people at each table, talking, dancing, eating and drinking, people are smiling. I hope tomorrow's wedding is just the same. They are old university friends of both Husband and I. (We might be a little early though, I just checked our rail reservations and realised I chose the wrong radio button and we are booked on an 8 o'clock train when we don't need to be there until 4pm! agh, lesson learnt, don't book tickets hungover)

And because I've been really bad at wedding recaps recently, here's a photo from the reception with the cake cutting. The tartan is that of my new surname and the silk scarf I am wearing as a sash was a present from my new parents-in-law which was waiting for me on the table when we sat down to eat. The cheeses which make up the cake are all local & the cake toppers were my attempt at birds...

Wedding VII

Love Divine, all loves excelling,
Joy of heaven, to earth come down,
Fix in us thy humble dwelling,
All thy faithful mercies crown.
Jesus, thou art all compassion,
Pure unbounded love thou art;
Visit us with thy salvation,
Enter every trembling heart.

Come, almighty to deliver,
Let us all thy grace receive;
Suddenly return, and never,
Never more thy temples leave.
Thee we would be always blessing,
Serve thee as thy hosts above,
Pray, and praise thee, without ceasing,
Glory in thy perfect love.

Finish then thy new creation
Pure and spotless let us be;
Let us see thy great salvation,
Perfectly restored in thee,
Changed from glory into glory,
Till in heaven we take our place,
Till we cast our crowns before thee,

Lost in wonder, love, and praise!

As we walked down the aisle, I held tight to my Dad's arm and tried to smile and look at the guests who were all smiling at us. I could see M, stood next to his best man, looking slightly nervous and standing up very straight and tall and looking so beautiful.

We stood next to each flanked by my Dad and Ben and, like a couple of teenagers, M and I nervously squeezed each others hands and sang the first hymn. I could hear my Dad's voice breaking a little as he sang, which of course made me start to cry as well. He handed me his hanky and whispered "Good luck, Miss G...".

Wedding VI

And then, finally, it was time to get married.

{All photos by Katie Thompson Photos}

On being married

"Talk to brides, as I did while researching Wedding Babylon, a look behind the scenes of the happiest day of your life, and the symptoms are obvious. They all spoke of feeling flat after the wedding, of being in tears on the honeymoon and the dreadful empty feeling of anti-climax.” Compound this with the fact that the average couple spends between £20,000 and £24,000 (the equivalent of the annual national wage) on the wedding and that 20 per cent of couples start married life in debt, it is no wonder that new brides are so miserable" writes Imogen Edwards-Jones in today's Times.

I wouldn't say that I am miserable. Frustrated perhaps, at not having a job. Irritated that, technically, I suppose I am now a housewife, which is very much not where I saw myself when I said 'yes' last June. But not miserable. I didn't think I would mind being paid for. I was wrong. Not bringing in any money makes me feel I have to do all the housework and keep the place clean and tidy, rather than simply my share as I did before. Despite the fact that I am spending my time applying for jobs, attending interviews, doing unpaid work etc, so I don't actually have that much more 'free' time, it somehow seems that as I am not earning, I should be doing more of the other things.

So yes, if I am being brutally honest, coming back to London after the honeymoon felt a little flat. {although, thank goodness for Wimbledon and hot weather: I had plenty of distraction during the first week}. I do feel that the support is better between us, even when we are jostling for position within our new relationship; that we really are a family unit.

Leaving the wedding, just before I threw the bouquet {of which Alex caught such an amazing photo I will devote a post to it later in the recaps}

Saying goodbye to the DJ and the band {inc. BestMan}, carrying a plate of cheese from the 'cake' which one of the bridesmaids had thoughtfully put aside for us, thinking correctly that (a) we wouldn't have eaten any earlier on and that (b) we would be starving when we got to our hotel.

Leaving the reception...

...and returning again the next morning to help with the final clearing up. Yes, we are still in the same clothes...

{All photos by Alex, my sister's boyfriend}

Wedding V

And then, finally, it was the big day. I woke, feeling like absolute shxt, to be perfectly honest. Cold sweats, hot shivers, stomach pains. The whole works: I felt like I had flu. My sisters got into bed with me and massaged my legs and my shoulders and then Mum and Dad and Alex came into the bedroom too with their tea and I had a good old cry about this being the last time we would be together as a family and, after a healthy dose of painkillers, started to feel a bit better. Grannie and Grandpa came over and made coffee and then the hard work began.

I started out helping in the marquee with the laying of tables but was quickly chased back upstairs to wash my hair and have a shower. In fact, Francesca, my makeup artist arrived promptly at 10am and was horrified to find me still in my pyjamas, dirty hair and helping the girls in the marquee.

Two hours later and that is the reason why you have a professional hair and makeup artist. Francesca was brilliant: calmly and quickly my hair had been dried and styled and she had applied beautiful but natural looking makeup. Her assistant even removed my old toenail varnish as I had not even had time to stop for a manicure the day before.

Of course, during this time, the bridesmaids were also getting ready: doing their own hair and makeup between them and curling their hair. I had been in the master bedroom which Mum and Dad then needed so there were 6 of us cramped into a small twin bedroom, people fighting for mirror space. Francesca and her assistant, Tara, are actually friends of mine, so after my makeup and hair was finished they turned back into regular guests who needed to get ready.

And then, all too quickly, the wedding car was here and it was time to leave for the service.

Wedding IV

So, after the quickest supper ever with my parents, grandparents, sisters and boyfriends, I dragged everyone back out to the marquee. Despite having a splitting headache I knew we needed to get as much of the setting up done as possible the night before. There would be a lot of laying up to do in the morning and so I wanted to at least have the main set up done.

We arranged tables and chairs, discovering at that point that the marquee company had not cleaned the chairs as they said they would {leading to a frantic call for chair cleaning volunteers the next morning} and set out glasses {learning the hard way that if you hire glasses from Sainsbury's they may be dirty and may leave dark rings on your white tableclothes}. We set out all the soft drinks and beer that we had bought, leaving out icebuckets for the ushers to fill the next morning.

Bunting was hung, peacock feathers were put out and candles placed on all the tables. Napkins were set out at each place with name tags attached. The whole family were wonderful and everyone pulled together, working effortlessly to get the task done. Eventually, after a team photo, we decided we had done all that we could and so headed back inside to celebrate my Grannie's birthday with a cake and more tea and opening some cards and presents.

I then turned my hand to the 100 peonies which were siting in buckets of water by an open window, to try and keep them from opening properly until the morning. Having only had one practice, and not with peonies, I wasn't sure what they would turn out like, but in the end, with my Mum and Dad's help, I made one large bouquet for myself and three smaller ones for the bridesmaids. And they looked exactly like I had hoped. Bizarely, I realised I had perched on an arm of an armchair for over an hour wrapping the stalks in tape whilst my Mum knelt on the floor stripping the leaves and my Dad held bunches together to be wrapped in more tape. Again, an effortless team and I realised when we finished that Mum and I had not had one stressed or cross word with each other all day.

With another cup of tea it was off to bed. A single bed in a shared room with my little sister. I am usually a good sleeper but that night, I struggled. It wasn't so much that I was nervous, it was that I never felt truly relaxed. I woke at 4am with hot sweats and shivers and felt like I had flu. Absolutely bloody terrible. I got water and paracetamol {thank goodness for those bridal survival kits and the leftovers} and tried to sleep again until Mum came into our room with breakfast at 7.30am. The wedding day...

{All images by Alex, my sister's boyfriend and Dad except the top left bouquet photo by Katie Thompson photography}

Wedding III

Wedding I
Wedding II

---

Whilst the rest of the family were eating their cake and drinking their tea and chatting to each other, I gave the bridesmaids their presents.

Somehow they had managed to squash themselves onto a sofa to drink their tea so it seemed the perfect opportunity to hand over their gifts and also to stop the questioning of what they needed for the next day. They all seemed to be pleased with the contents of their bags and, indeed, the bags themselves.

In fact, if you look carefully, on the arm of the sofa you can see the last minute additions I made to each bag: a bridal party survival kit, containing tissues, mints, safety pins, plasters, paracetamols and a nail file.

So, after about 10 minutes of peace and quiet it was rush rush rush as M and I led a 5 car convey to the chapel for the rehearsal. Previously, our Chaplain had indicated to us that this might be a very emotional run through, that people often cried and so on. We all arrived at the chapel and after some milling around we did a walk through of the service.

And then a walk through of the vows and ring exchange. Much to M's surprise, we added the words "etc, etc, bla bla bla" instead of 2 lines of the vows. Quite obvious when you think about it however, no point having the wedding the next day if you have already done it all the night before!

The rehearsal ended with a prayer for the next day and a round of goodbyes. Our photographer arrived and had a look at the chapel and then we looked round the university for good places to take photographs the next day. This done, we embarked on our last journey together unmarried: delivering champagne to our ushers who by this time had all arrived in Exeter.

Driving around the back lanes of the countryside gave us some time to reflect together on the day ahead and what we were looking forward to, as well as expressing our surprise that the rehearsal had been surprisingly mundane. No tears, no disasters {aside from forgetting the orders of service}. Having been warned we might be very tearful we were both a little flat that it hadn't been like that at all. Privately I started to wonder if I would ever find it emotional, as usually I am a very emotional person. Even the marquee hitch hadn't upset me or bothered me, as it usually might.

By 8.30pm we were back at the wedding reception venue, Fursdon. No long drawn out goodbye here either; a quick kiss and good luck, and with that, M headed back to his parents' cottages for his last family evening and I headed inside to see mine, for lasagne and for an evening of work which ended at 12.30am with Mum, Dad and I making the bouquets.

{All images by Alex, my sister's boyfriend}

Wedding II

We set off from London on the Thursday before the wedding with more things than I thought possible packed into M's Dad's car, including but not limited to boxes and boxes of crockery, wine, a picnic hamper and a barbecue to take on our honeymoon. M and I spent our last night together as single people crammed into the bottom bunk of a tiny bunk bed set at the cottages his parents had rented for the weekend.

And then it was the day before the wedding. We drove together to the wedding reception venue to meet the marquee men who were supposed to be erecting the marquee. Only there was no-one there. The place looked beautiful in the misty rain, but not exactly what we had been hoping for.

As we waited for the boys from the marquee company my flowers arrived. Sadly I did not have a camera to hand so I never got an image of the 100 white peonies all lying together in a box. We decanted them into a large bin of water, where they smelt gorgeous and I opened the first of many cards and presents we were handed that day: a photograph showing me at the first wedding I attended {my aunt and godmother's} and a beautiful calligraphy print featuring some of the words from the reading she would be doing during the service the next day.

Eventually the marquee boys arrived and after some hitches involving problems which would have been solved by carrying out a site visit {eventually we realised that the marquee was never going to look like our quoted plan and so accepted an on-the-spot solution which although didn't ruin the day, wasn't quite what we had in mind} and some more involving vans and mud and then tractors, the marquees went up. Despite these issues and the fact our schedule was now 2 hours out, we managed to keep calm and did what all British people do in times of strife and rain: made cups of tea.

It was then off to the supermarket to purchase all the soft drinks and beer for the reception; a supermarket sweep style race round the nearest Sainsbury's {being on a boycott of Tesco since the hen party fiasco} which we drove back to the reception venue and loaded into the marquee just in time for afternoon tea with all of our combined families, hosted by my grandparents. If it sounds like a mad rush, it really was. We had to be at the chapel for a rehearsal at 5pm and had hoped to get much of the table set up done before the rehearsal.

Yet at 4pm, the marquee had only just finished going up and the tables and chairs were still in stacks on the floor, dirty. Unwilling to forfeit the family get together/tea party we opted to leave the sorting out and we all piled upstairs into the holiday cottages to drink tea and eat 'granny sponge' and, for the grannies and grandpas, meet for the very first time.

{All images by Alex, my sister's boyfriend}

Wedding I

Before I begin telling the story that was our wedding, my favourite (so far) of the official wedding photos, taken as we were leaving the chapel.

{Image by Katie Thompson Photography}

And my favourite quotes (so far) from our guests: "it was the best wedding I have ever been to; it was just like an enormous house party" and "you know what made it so special, Rachel? It's that its all handmade".

Guest Post by A1- The Big Day

Now the big day is over, and what a wonderful big day it was!

As you can see from the pictures, Rachel was an absolutely radiant bride, and M didn't look too bad either! She put huge amounts of work into her outfit, which certainly paid off. As her sister, I may be biased but I have never seen a more beautiful bride - I am sure you will all agree! The peonies perfectly complemented the dresses and colour schemes, and came out exactly the right amount in the car on the way to the chapel.

Contrary to earlier fears, Rachel didn't need her wellies. The weekend started with mist which added a certain atmosphere, and cleared on the wedding morning, progressing to beautiful evening sunshine. The only spots of rain occurred at the chapel but simply aided the process of moving the guests on up to the reception.

The choice of reception venue was perfect. The marquee acted as a beautiful blank canvas onto which R and M created a perfect concoction of decoration which reflected their tastes and ideals exactly. It was set of wonderfully by the backdrop of rolling countryside as far as the eye could see.

Rachel and M were "touched by many people" (as M said in his speech!), and R especially requested that you were all thanked for your many lovely messages, cards, texts, emails and comments. It has been wonderful how many people have shared in this event in one way or another.

Perhaps I shall share some more later, but I would like to make sure that Rachel herself gets to tell you more of the detail once she returns.